This query is part of the Be an Agent for a Day contest. Rules and Regulations here
Please post your rejection or manuscript request in the comment section!
Dear Agent for a Day,
What if you could make things happen just by imagining them? Fourteen year old Sarah Lewis has the power, but she’d do anything to get rid of it. That’s because her talent is uncontrollable and unpredictable, and when it takes over, people usually end up getting hurt.
Sarah’s struggle to accept her gift and the responsibility it thrusts upon her are at the center of Running Blind, a completed young adult manuscript of approximately 60,000 words.
Fearful of her secret gift, Sarah does everything possible to avoid triggering it. She learns to blend into the background, avoid attention, and minimize emotional ties, all in an effort to keep herself from lashing out psychically. But everything changes when Sarah is invited to attend exclusive Delhart Academy, an “invitation only” private school surrounded by tall gates and an air of mystery. First, she catches the eye of god-like Student Recruiter Eric Sanders. Then there’s sexy Garrett Landry, a loner with a tattoo and an attitude the size of Mount Rainier. Garrett plays on Dancia’s deepest fears when he suggests that there’s something nefarious going on at Delhart, and Eric is playing an integral part.
Eventually, Sarah will be forced to take sides in the most difficult struggle she has ever faced. Should she trust Eric, or Garrett? Must she follow the rules, or her own instincts for what is right and wrong? And perhaps most importantly, can she learn to believe in her talent, or will she always be fighting with a piece of herself?
A little about me, I am an active member of the Romance Writers of America and a former Golden Heart Finalist. I am also an attorney, mom to two fabulous kids, and very slow triathlete.
Thank you for your time. I would welcome an email or phone call if you are interested in seeing more of Running Blind. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Author
STATS: 17% request rate
abouttothunder says
Dear Author,
Thank you for the opportunity to represent your work. Unfortunately, it isn’t a good fit for me. Since you deserve an agent who will fully support you project, I will have to pass.
I wish you the best of luck in finding representation.
Sincerely,
Agent-for-a-day Sara
P.S. Actually, I’m intriqued, but not quite hooked enough. I was lost with the mention of Dancia. It would be helpful to state more explicitly and earlier what seems to trigger Sarah’s talent.
Rik says
Thank you for submitting your book – Running Blind – for my consideration. Regrettably, I do not feel that I am able to represent this work for you. Best wishes for your future endeavours. Agent Rik.
EJN says
Dear Author,
I’m a sucker for a good YA book, especially one with themes of girls learning how to use their power, whatever it might be. Also, you had strong credentials and charmed me by identifying yourself as a “slow triathlete”. Please send me the first 3 chapters of your manuscript. I look forward to reading it.
Best of luck,
Agent EJN
GuyStewart/DISCOVERCHURCH says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your query, but I’m going to have to pass. I do not feel strongly enough about your story to represent it well.
Sincerely, Guy Stewart
Leis says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. While I think your story has potential, it is not something I feel confident taking on at this time.
Please feel free to query me with future projects.
Good luck with RUNNING BLIND.
Best regards,
Agent for a Day
AndrewDugas says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query, but I do not believe I would be the best advocate for your novel. I wish you luck in finding representation elsewhere.
Sincerely,
Andy
Madhat says
Dear Author:
I’m going to have to pass.
-Agent
Why: It doesn’t seem that original. I get tired of hearing boys in YA books described one-dimensionally: “god-like,” “sexy,” etc. Also, who is Dancia?
PCB says
Dear Author,
Thank you for submitting your query. We are not in a position to represent you at this time, but wish you all the very best in your writing endeavors.
Sincerely,
PCB
donnas says
Thank you for your submission, but I feel that this is not the right fit for me at this time.
Best of luck.
Dawn says
Dear Author,
Thank you for contacting Dawn Ink. Unfortunately, Running Blind is not what we’re looking for right now.
Best of luck in finding representation.
Sincerely,
Dawn
—–
This is a promising. I like her ability and the hint of something sinister at the academy, but (I may be a prude here) would a 14-year-old describe someone as sexy? I don’t read enough YA to know. Sorry.
Anonymous says
Dear Author,
Thank you for taking the time to submit your query to me.
At this moment in time, however, I choose to pass on your project. This does not automatically mean your query isn’t good enough. It simply means that I am not the right agent for this project. This can be for a number of reasons.
If you would like to know why, you can send a reply to this mail. Please change the subject line to: FEEDBACK / RUNNING BLIND / YOUR NAME. I will respond to your request within two weeks.
Good luck with finding representation and keep on writing!
Kind regards,
Nicole34
SuzieQ Agent4U says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, I do not feel your book is right for me. Good luck with your search.
Best,
S
Note: Overall, a strong query. I’d use a different word than ‘sexy’ though since it doesn’t seem like a word teens would use. Think you meant ‘Sarah’ rather than ‘Dancia’ unless there’s another character in the mix. Love the ‘slow triathlete’ line.
2readornot says
I am intrigued. Please send along the entire manuscript.
Anahita says
Dear Author:
Thanks for sharing your query. Sorry I can’t represent your work. Good luck!
Anahita
That Girl says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, I will have to pass at this time.
Best of luck,
That Agent Girl
Saint_Fool says
Dear Author:
Thank you for your query. Unfortunately, I do not feel that your story is the right fit for me.
Best of luck.
Saint_Fool
Enusan says
Thank you for your query. I was on the fence with this title for quite a while, but after some meditation on it will have to decline. Ultimately the premise does not separate itself from many similar books about kids with super powers in a meaningful way.
Diana says
Really liked this query, would like to request. Nice job.
Kathy says
Thank you for your query. I’m going to have to pass on this project.
Best of luck to you.
Sincerely,
Kathy
R. Markiam says
Dear Author,
Thank you for your query letter and for thinking of me for representation of Running Blind. While your novel sounds intriguing, I’m sorry to say I won’t be able to pursue it further with you. I wish you all the best in securing other representation.
Regards,
R. Markiam
Anonymous says
Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this project is not a good fit for me. I appreciate your time and consideration, and wish you luck in finding representation.
Best,
Agent M
MonkBoy says
Thank you for your query submission, but I’m afraid we’re not interested in your material at this time.
Best of luck,
Placebo Publications
ludwig snarf says
Snarf City! Please send the first 50 pages.
Laura Martone says
Dear Author:
Thank you for submitting your query for consideration. I appreciate the time, energy, and passion that it required to complete “Running Blind”.
Unfortunately, given the thousands of queries that I receive annually, I can only request a small percentage of manuscripts for possible representation. While I find the subject matter of your novel intriguing, it does not meet my editorial needs at this time.
I am grateful for the opportunity to consider your work and wish you much luck in your future endeavors.
Sincerely,
Laura Martone
Livia says
Thank you for your query, but it is not a good fit for me. Best wishes.
Livia
Linta says
Dear Author
Thanks for your submission. I’m going to pass your query on to a colleague who may find it of interest.
I wish you luck in finding it a suitable home.
Regards
Agent for a day
Sara J. Henry says
Encouraging rejection and request to query more later[Reasons: For some reason I was drawn to this one (despite a few issues in the query) – and had actually originally requested pages when I realized I’d gone over the allowed 5]