Nathan Bransford - Literary Agent: [blank] Are the New Vampires

Thursday, November 5, 2009

[blank] Are the New Vampires

Come on, you know you want to try it. Insert your own guess in the comments.

I'm going with fallen pirate apocalyptic ninja angels as the new vampire.

1010 comments:

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Kiersten White said...: I'll see your fallen pirate apocalyptic ninja angels and raise you a fallen FAERIE pirate apocalyptic ninja zombie-fighting psychic angel!; November 5, 2009 8:35 AM
Cora Zane said...: Ooh, yeah, she raised you a zombie for the win! I'd read that just to say I did! ~_^; November 5, 2009 8:36 AM
Macie said...: No, no, no . . . its got to be a moody, saddened immortal cyclops with the ability give the appearance of two eyes and who has a propensity to fly with magical wings.; November 5, 2009 8:38 AM
Liana Brooks said...: Gargoyles.

Actually, I've seen demons and fallen angels in a lot of books lately. Tempting an angel to sin seems to be a common romance plot.

But, for preference, I'll see Kiersten's FAERIE pirate apocalyptic ninja zombie-fighting psychic angel and raise you a ZOMBIE half-demon pirate fairy post-apocalyptic ninja drag queen!; November 5, 2009 8:39 AM
Sherry said...: Angels. I've read on several agents Web sites that they are over loaded with query letters about angels.; November 5, 2009 8:39 AM
Jennifer said...: It's definitely going to be half-elven, half-dragon post-apocalyptic magic-tattoo-wearing black-winged steampunk space-pirate ninjas from a hell dimension.; November 5, 2009 8:40 AM
Terry Towery said...: Easy peasy: Vampire apocalyptic monkeys of Mayan descent which haunt our homes while we sleep and capture it all on video.; November 5, 2009 8:41 AM
Jason Hosler said...: I think I would back up the idea shown on Penny Arcade and say that Mummies will be the new vampires; November 5, 2009 8:42 AM
Jen said...: And while we're on the subject, what ever happened to Fairies? Fairy fairies. Why is everything all of sudden Faeries? Of the Fae.; November 5, 2009 8:42 AM
Suzanne Young said...: It's Faeries... wait. I missed it. Okay, it's zombies... dang. Um... werewolves! Too late. Angels?? Sigh.

Okay, how about a book about girls who track down cheating boyfriends? Phew. I caught that train. :-); November 5, 2009 8:42 AM
Teri said...: I'll go with aliens from some distant galaxy.; November 5, 2009 8:43 AM
Larissa said...: According to Maggie Stiefvater, KRACKEN are the new vampire.

(and if you haven't watched her hilarious you tube video on the subject, you need to go find it right now).; November 5, 2009 8:44 AM
lotusgirl said...: I think it's Zombies. They seem to be everywhere these days, and, personally, I just don't see the appeal. To each his own.; November 5, 2009 8:47 AM
Audrianna said...: Old vampires are SO the new vampires.

LOL; November 5, 2009 8:50 AM
John said...: Emo-goth bipedal kittens that ride magic winged donkeys.; November 5, 2009 8:50 AM
diesel said...: hybrids. Werepires (Werewolf vampire crossovers), zompires and vambies (two different things, but both cross-pollinations of zombies and vampires), succubies (succubus fairies or zombies... or anything ending in ies).; November 5, 2009 8:52 AM
Mira said...: Love.

Love is the new vampire.

Can't we all just get along?

On that note, ANOTHER Nathan post! I am in heaven. Happy, happy, happy.; November 5, 2009 8:53 AM
Rick Daley said...: Old Vampires are the New Vampires, because honestly, the New Vampires have lost their bite (they traded it for sparkles).; November 5, 2009 8:55 AM
Balinares said...: Agents are the new vampires.

Deep down you just know it. :); November 5, 2009 8:55 AM
Mira said...: Oh, seriously, in terms of YA topic trends, I think books that mimic the internet - twitter, facebook, blogs - might have a shot. Hard to predict.

Also, whatever Meyers new series is.

In many ways, it's not the topic, it's the author. Lots of folks wrote about vampires before Meyers. She writes page-turners.

So, any author that writes a YA page-turner right now would have quite a good shot at it.; November 5, 2009 8:56 AM
L. T. Host said...: You wanna know what's going to be the new vampire?

An emo girl falls in love with a zombie who really wants to eat her BBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNNNSSSSSSS, but can't, because there's something... different about her. Something... delicious, probably her BRRAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNNNSSSSSSS, but the zombie is a vegetarian zombie who only eats cabbage and broccoli, because they look like BBBRRRRRAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNNNSSSSSSS, and won't touch the girl, for fear of rotting all over her and then trying to eat her BBBRRRRAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNSSSSSSS.

Thanks, Nathan, I think I have the idea for a new MS! I'll be querying you with it in... a month!; November 5, 2009 8:57 AM
Rick Daley said...: Now I read the prior comments and see that Audrianna already used Old Vampires. Damn clever of her. Option number 2:

WORD VERIFICATION: saskine. The New Vampires.; November 5, 2009 8:57 AM
Whitney said...: In all seriousness, I think the fantasy ensemble is the next vampire. (The Mortal Instruments anyone? That series, along with Percy Jackson is about to explode); November 5, 2009 8:58 AM
Aimee States said...: Enslaved circus zombies who love the Mega .gov Sheep Clones who want to kill them.; November 5, 2009 8:58 AM
AM said...: My guess: humans with paranormal abilities.; November 5, 2009 8:58 AM
L. T. Host said...: That was sarcasm, by the way. Just want to make that clear.; November 5, 2009 8:59 AM
Rhonda said...: Ok. I'm not going to say it again. If you don't know what I mean by that, oh well. Instead I'm going to go with kids/teens being the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 9:01 AM
sraasch said...: Ninjas have been the new vampires for YEARS. What? You didn't know that? Eh, no one really knows that. They're still trying to figure out how they can come out with their immense popularity while still being un-find-able.

On a serious note: How about healthy relationships being the new vampires?; November 5, 2009 9:02 AM
tlc22 said...: Sarah Palin and the Radio City Music Hall Rocketts; November 5, 2009 9:04 AM
Audrianna said...: Rick - Great minds think alike, right?; November 5, 2009 9:04 AM
Jason said...: I thought we were still on vampires...; November 5, 2009 9:06 AM
D. G. Hudson said...: I'd like to see the Anti-Vampires as the New Vampires. Perhaps they can clear off all the rest of the bloody vampires.

Not my type of reading or writing material, but we all have different tastes. I think the implication of danger, but danger that is sexy, is what appeals to the predominantly female readers, when it comes to vampires.

I prefer aliens and UFOs myself.; November 5, 2009 9:07 AM
Fleur said...: Amish hooker swat teams are the new vampires. It's SO obvious.; November 5, 2009 9:07 AM
B. Nagel said...: ______ is the new vampires.

That's right, a creeping nothingness threatening to destroy the world. Or at least a small town with star crossed lovers in it.

Or maybe it's aliens with Edwardian values.

One of those.; November 5, 2009 9:14 AM
ninidee.wordpress.com said...: How about leprachauns that grow into giants? They'd be able to get over a rainbow with ease.; November 5, 2009 9:14 AM
scott g.f.bailey said...: Writers. Sexy writers of literary fiction.; November 5, 2009 9:15 AM
Ink said...: Wallabies.

I mean, come on, just say it. Wallaby. I know you enjoyed it. And they're cute. Totally all the rage.

Come on, now, I dare you not to say it. Wallaby. You know you can't resist, you have to say it... Wallaby. You know you want to. Give in to the dark side of the Force...

Wallaby...

Okay, sparkly wallabies if you must.; November 5, 2009 9:16 AM
Scott said...: Shirtless, Time Traveling, Fraud Perpetrating, Investment Bankers...; November 5, 2009 9:17 AM
Matilda McCloud said...: I hope Neanderthals are the new vampires because that's what my novel is about! They were 100% human--no paranormal stuff, and yet, who knows what they were really like? They had much BIGGER brains than us...; November 5, 2009 9:19 AM
Anonymous said...: shirtless investment bankers, sexy literary fiction writers.

I think you just named this preppy girl's price.; November 5, 2009 9:20 AM
Donna Gambale said...: We're going to return to the Roswell High series-era and go with sexy aliens. Who can conveniently bring about the apocalypse.

And since angels are already passe, we're heading down into the deep, hot south for some demon lovin' (Rachelle Mead's doing this already with her awesome Succubus Blues series). Make it a steampunk-y demon for the win.

Plus other paranormal-y things, like banshees (Rachel Vincent's Soul Screamers series, for example). And Jennifer's elves suggestion is totally happening, a la Orlando Bloom in LOTR.

PS - Fleur, I second Amish hooker SWAT teams.; November 5, 2009 9:21 AM
Scott said...: Personally, I'm waiting for the Vampire Lestat to come out of retirement and kick the crap out of Edward Cullen for laughs.

I would nominate Jon and Kate Gosselin as the New Vampires.; November 5, 2009 9:21 AM
Amber said...: Angels and Demons are the new vampire. Not to be confused with the Dan Brown novel. Vampires may appear as demons. See "TV - Charmed" and copy basic plot. ;-); November 5, 2009 9:22 AM
AM said...: "Beginning in March 2010, American Vampire, a comic from Vertigo (DC Comics), will be released each month, including two stories: one by short story writer Scott Snyder and the other by Stephen King." - Publishing Trends, November 2009

Oh, well, perhaps humans with paranormal abilities will be able to defeat the vampires - one day?; November 5, 2009 9:22 AM
Barb said...: Whatever they are, could they just not sparkle, please.; November 5, 2009 9:23 AM
Stephanie Feldstein said...: I'm going with Wereturtles. They'd put those teenage mutants to shame!; November 5, 2009 9:24 AM
A name will be forthcoming. said...: Sharks with head mounted lasers are the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 9:24 AM
maybegenius said...: I'm going with emotionally wounded weretigers with hearts of gold and a secret yearning to DANCE LIKE THE STARS.; November 5, 2009 9:24 AM
Kurtis said...: I've said it before and I'll say it again: Lovecraft-style monster gods.; November 5, 2009 9:26 AM
Becca said...: Considering that the Vampire fad seems to be the thing of young fiction I am going to guess that it will be eating disorders. Bulimia is the new vampires. But, tagging onto what people have said before, maybe it will be zombie bulimics. They eat tons and tons of brains and then throw them up so that they don't look fat, then someone finally explains to them that as members of the undead, they can't technically gain weight.; November 5, 2009 9:27 AM
PatriciaW said...: But they have to be Amish fallen pirate apocalyptic ninja angels...; November 5, 2009 9:30 AM
L. T. Host said...: Ink-- figures you would come up with my one weakness. Sparkly wallabies... fine. I'll just submit to my doom, now, thanks.; November 5, 2009 9:31 AM
Kristi said...: Were-unicorns shifters They're a slam-dunk in the erotic romance end of the paranormal spectrum.

Though I'd say gargoyles are a close second. Made of stone, you know.

And let's not forget the bunny-shifters. Cute, fluffy, and they do it like, well, bunnies :); November 5, 2009 9:32 AM
John said...: Swamp creatures. Teenage swamp creatures in love. No question.; November 5, 2009 9:33 AM
Lisa Dez said...: Balinares @8:55 said it! Agents! Right Nathan?

Want proof? Check out the header on Janet Reid's blog.; November 5, 2009 9:33 AM
Alena Thomas said...: Vampires are always going to be "IT". I'm just ready for some I can, I hate to say it, sink my teeth into...non-sparkling, jagged teeth, carnivores.; November 5, 2009 9:36 AM
Kristi said...: Has anyone said space monkeys? If not, I'm going with that.; November 5, 2009 9:36 AM
Jen Chandler said...: I'm going to have to agree with Whitney.

But I would like to see the fallen pirate ninjas :)

Jen; November 5, 2009 9:40 AM
Rick Daley said...: Audrianna- It seems they do. So do modest mids ;-)

WORD VERIFICATION: archler. The New Old Vampire.; November 5, 2009 9:41 AM
Mr. Hook said...: Balinares said...
"Agents are the new vampires."

I declare Balinares to be the winner of this thread!

Because if Kristie is right about the space monkeys we are gonna be so screwed in 2012...; November 5, 2009 9:43 AM
L.H. Parker said...: LOL. I predict a surge in YA fantasy warfare series. It's the post-ghoul-apocalyptic steampunk fae-vamps fighting the dreaded pre-troll-invasion cyperpunk Gorgon-witches. Throw in coffee grounds, a couple spinning hat gadgets, and a crying 12 year old and we're set.; November 5, 2009 9:44 AM
CKHB said...: MY BOOK is the new vampires! Somebody get over here and represent me!!!!

(Cough.)

Okay, fine, I'm going with:

Steampunk children's books
Zombie chick lit
Mom-lit crime novels
Emo cozy mysteries
Amish vampire romances

and, vampires who roam the country saving humans from zombies in order to protect the last of their dwindling food supplies. (Yes, this is an existing comic book.); November 5, 2009 9:44 AM
P. Grier said...: I don't think zombies have much potential for character development or plot.; November 5, 2009 9:45 AM
terryd said...: Corrupt, powerful people are the old vampires.

But these new ones have some nasty-sharp fangs.; November 5, 2009 9:49 AM
Cory Clubb said...: I say aliens. Far Far Away star-crossed lovers or maybe warring worlds. Look at new films Avatar, Distric 9 or TV's new shows V, and Stargate Series.

They're everywhere.; November 5, 2009 9:50 AM
Sarah Laurenson said...: Ooh. Drag queens. Yes. With, um, fairy godfathers who chain smoke medical marijuana. And elves who don't know they're elves - they think they're fallen angels. All set in a steam punk chocolate factory.; November 5, 2009 9:52 AM
Ciara Blount said...: Angel assassins, definitely.; November 5, 2009 9:54 AM
abc said...: My serious, official guesses:

Hot ghosts
Time traveling hot guys
Hot warlocks

As long as they are seriously good-looking and brooding and mysterious and somewhat dangerous or out of reach.; November 5, 2009 9:57 AM
Joseph L. Selby said...: This question has already been answered with some authority: http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2009/10/12/; November 5, 2009 9:57 AM
Julie Dao said...: Tortured, anthropomorphic, outwardly gruff but hiding-a-heart-of-gold wolf/buffalo/bear/lion-like creatures. I could see the Beauty and the Beast theme taking over after all the vampire/human love stories.; November 5, 2009 9:58 AM
bethanyintexas said...: I hear all sorts of things. One minute I hear werewolves are going to be the next big thing then turn around and hear it's going to be mermaids. So hey, could be anything. What about cenaturs falling in love with humans? Every other creature does it, they did it in Greek Mythology, why not in more modern fiction?; November 5, 2009 10:04 AM
Alexa said...: Zombie unicorns!; November 5, 2009 10:04 AM
Renee Collins said...: emo mummy love triangles.; November 5, 2009 10:08 AM
J.J. Bennett said...: Hey! How did you know that was my current WIP?; November 5, 2009 10:10 AM
Whirlochre said...: OLD vampires.

Coffin-bound, garlic-fearing, stake-cursed, Lugosi-esque, vulnerable yet loveable, OLD vampires.

Or budgerigars. Any genre, as long as they sing nice.; November 5, 2009 10:16 AM
Aubrey (AKA Stacey) said...: This has been about the best laugh I have had in a long long time!

I'm going to say Time-traveling shape-shifting humanoid aliens.; November 5, 2009 10:18 AM
cynjay said...: Hoarding. Or at least I hope so.; November 5, 2009 10:20 AM
Terry said...: Buxom blond vampires.

I've heard agents saying they are inundated with buxom blondes lately.; November 5, 2009 10:20 AM
Bahnree said...: Fanfic writers, who fight ALL of the above in their spare time.; November 5, 2009 10:22 AM
Anonymous said...: I guess whoever got bitten by the old Vampire....; November 5, 2009 10:24 AM
Loren Eaton said...: Librarians, of course.; November 5, 2009 10:28 AM
Sam Hranac said...: Zombies are the next Saturday morning cartoon and breakfast cereal, so they can't be the true NEXT thing.

I would go with Energy workers. Kids who are passing through puberty to discover that they can draw power from the void. An evolution in this organic matter we inhabit, bringing us closer to spirit.

You know... sexually aware indigo children.; November 5, 2009 10:29 AM
Pam Harris said...: Well, based on the latest election results, I'm saying that republicans are the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 10:30 AM
StrugglingSerpent said...: ....it came from outerspace!; November 5, 2009 10:33 AM
Joshua said...: After recently reviewing some video game magazines, I'm going to have to go with Post-Apocalyptic-First-Person-Shooter as the new vampire. But that's just me.

Great blog, sir. So glad I chanced upon it.

-Joshua; November 5, 2009 10:39 AM
Anonymous said...: 2012

Amish writing going mainstream

and something COMPLETELY different from all of the above, rooted in history and the heartland of America. Think Laura Ingalls Wilder, perhaps.; November 5, 2009 10:40 AM
megan lee said...: Baba Yaga is the new vampires.

Look into your heart, you know it to be true.; November 5, 2009 10:42 AM
Cary said...: The new vampire is: The Homicidal Golfer..

www.InsidetheHedges.com; November 5, 2009 10:44 AM
Anonymous said...: Not just a new vampire, a lovable empathetic revenant character who's wronged by the system. The symbolism and tropes and motifs must be fresh and original and timely relevant in order to be new. Life's blood sucking parasites, a tick like, a mosquito, a gadfly, none of which are empathetic, per se.

Hmm, how about an undead woman with an overwhelming biological imperative who can't regenerate perpetually without occasionally sucking the emotional center out of a corrupt man, his id, his joie de vivre. Of course, his joyful essences are the vices of greed and moral corruption. Say, he revels in writing sub prime home mortages that are predetermined to default, kind of a vampire in his own right. They're made for each other, but she's a black widow/praying mantis mater [sic].

Or a vampire evicted from his home grave soil due to a corrupt foreclosure seeks new digs and discovers a global conspiracy purposed to retask residential real estate for biofuel production, effectively reducing and displacing an underdog populace so that they migrate to crowded offshore floating high rise tenements.

The Mismatist; November 5, 2009 10:46 AM
Richard said...: Social media experts are the new vampires. :P Seriously... everyone is apparently an expert!; November 5, 2009 10:51 AM
TC Laverdure said...: "Politicians" are the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 10:55 AM
Gemma said...: Avatar; November 5, 2009 10:57 AM
hannah said...: Shapeshifters. Just wait.; November 5, 2009 10:59 AM
Susan Quinn said...: Fallen economists wielding Biblical powers; November 5, 2009 11:00 AM
Chuck H. said...: Definitely replicated steampowered rabid armadillo clones - blue ones. Definitely.; November 5, 2009 11:01 AM
Stuart said...: Smurfs are the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 11:02 AM
Marsha Sigman said...: It has to be HOT, how are they going to make zombies hot?
Just not possible. I think the Werewolf trend is going to get bigger especially with New Moon about to come out at theaters.; November 5, 2009 11:03 AM
Samantha Tonge said...: i know the answer, cos it's starring in my new supernatural wip for young teens. But if i told you, i'd have to shoot you.

:); November 5, 2009 11:08 AM
Mister Fweem said...: I'm so weary of vampires (disgustingly sexpotty or weepingly abstinent), zombies (fast or slow), zombie-vampires, vampire-zombies, angels, demons, demon-angels, vampire aliens, aliens in general that I actually spent the last week reading a book on geopolitics by Richard Nixon. Yes, THAT Richard Nixon. I'm gonna vote for a reincarnation of Scooby Doo-like villains. Professor Hyde-White, anyone?; November 5, 2009 11:09 AM
Samantha Tonge said...: That thing out of the LIttle Mermaid that steals a voice. Let's have an underwater theme.; November 5, 2009 11:10 AM
Ulysses said...: Ostriches.; November 5, 2009 11:12 AM
Thermocline said...: Memoirs by pets, especially those owned by vampires or zombies.; November 5, 2009 11:15 AM
me said...: werewolves; November 5, 2009 11:15 AM
Kristin Laughtin said...: [I'm going to try not to look at the other responses before posting mine].

Zombie fairy ninja ballerina pirates. They are of course tragically angsty and beautiful.; November 5, 2009 11:20 AM
Polenth said...: Steampunk cephalopod assassins are the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 11:20 AM
Anonymous said...: The hotness of zombies hasn't been the zombies themselves; it's been the vicarious Big Game Hunter slaugtering all the emotionally indifferent undead creatures of the veldt mob craving fleeting attention and approval and acclaim in place of enduring, meaningful relationships.

Zombies will remain hot until population numbers decline or a new paradigm redefines zombies' symbolic role in the collective subconsciousness.

Same with bug-eyed monster aliens.

Zenophobists unite! Destroy all intrusive othernesses.

Zenophobists as the New Vampires.; November 5, 2009 11:21 AM
LitWitch said...: Fallen Angels.
Mermaids.
Steampunk.
Undead.

Although shouts out to sparkly wallabies & Smurfs!; November 5, 2009 11:21 AM
Jabez said...: Ballooning accidents; November 5, 2009 11:31 AM
Anonymous said...: Gay, Amish Vampires, in novels written by straight women, who can shape shift, live in daylight, and make farmer cheese and quilts that have magical time-travel powers.; November 5, 2009 11:33 AM
Portuguese cunt said...: {literary agents} are the new vampires.; November 5, 2009 11:35 AM
Valerie said...: Gnomes.

Everyone thinks it werewolves, angels or fairies, but they're wrong. Gnomes are super hot (and tall), they've just been misrepresented for the last 100 years or so. You'll see.; November 5, 2009 11:37 AM
PhilH said...: 4th century English kings.

With laser swords.; November 5, 2009 11:43 AM
Dara said...: Fairies. Zombies. Aliens that disguise themselves as humans--or aliens that disguise themselves as fairies or zombies. :P; November 5, 2009 11:49 AM
Diana said...: How about variety being the new vampires?

Call me a rebel, but wouldn't publishers sell more books if they offered a variety of stories instead of the same thing with different covers?

Can we have fallen pirate apocalyptic ninja angels and zombies and faeries and moody, saddened immortal cyclops and demons and fallen angels and ... well, you get the point.

I read a lot. I love books. But, there is nothing more frustrating to me than to go into a bookstore and not be able to find anything that I want to read. I'm not that picky when it comes to genre. I read thrillers, romance, fantasy, science fiction, military fiction, historical fiction, etc.

Sigh. Whatever the new trend is, I hope it is something that I want to read.; November 5, 2009 11:50 AM
Elizabeth said...: Fae are the New Vampires-Melissa Marr's novels Wicked Lovely and all have caught on...many readers and writers alike seem drawn to the world of fae and their frivolous Summer, cool Winter, and lustful Dark Courts.; November 5, 2009 11:52 AM
Sean Cummings said...: Hookers; November 5, 2009 11:53 AM
DMBeucler said...: Unicorns are the new vampires. Think on it: Vampires are one big sexual innuendo. With Unicorns you not only get the sexual innuendo (they like to lay their horned heads in the laps of virgins) but also sparkles and hooves.; November 5, 2009 11:57 AM
Jen P said...: Olympian gods and human heroes - in time for 2012.; November 5, 2009 12:00 PM
Haste yee back ;-) said...: Tinea Corporis... is the new Vampire!

Haste yee back ;-); November 5, 2009 12:04 PM
Sherry said...: Shape shifting-psychic-witches-that belong to a secret society with their symbolisms built into American culture.; November 5, 2009 12:14 PM
Anonymous said...: I'm going for were-carebears. I see Sucks-blood-a-lot bear as a transitional figure, cuddly and blood thristy.; November 5, 2009 12:16 PM
Roni @ FictionGroupie said...: Please let it be humans.; November 5, 2009 12:16 PM
Anonymous said...: Televangelists are the new vampires and should be subsequently staked through the heart.; November 5, 2009 12:22 PM
Marilyn Peake said...: I've heard from numerous publishing people that gods of all sorts and space aliens are quite probably one of the next hot "vampire" subjects ... and my latest novel, GODS IN THE MACHINE, revolves around both. I've received some great feedback and interest, and am crossing my fingers for the future of this book. :) I have some news regarding GODS IN THE MACHINE, but won't be ready to announce it for at least the next few months.; November 5, 2009 12:23 PM
spwriter said...: Flying monkeys.; November 5, 2009 12:24 PM
SeaHayes said...: Pickle-headed monkeys!; November 5, 2009 12:24 PM
Kate said...: Monsters are the new Vampires.; November 5, 2009 12:28 PM
DonnaV said...: Anything we can't have. If you look at the best sellers since the beginning of time they almost never really happen. I mean whether it's impossibly idealistic romance novels, tales about immortality, super skills, or impossible situations. We want what we can't get, so we do the next best thing and read about it.; November 5, 2009 12:29 PM
Maya / מיה said...: Leprechauns.; November 5, 2009 12:31 PM
Jess Haines said...: Oh, that's easy. Psychic zombie faerie wizard monk bards who sparkle in sunlight and bring about the apocolypse in 2012 are the new vampires!

(...do I get a cookie if I'm right?); November 5, 2009 12:37 PM
Marilyn Peake said...: Having mentioned space aliens, I forgot to post a link to a movie about space aliens that's coming out this weekend and has a very intriguing trailer: THE FOURTH KIND. I'm definitely planning to see it!; November 5, 2009 12:41 PM
Mira said...: Marilyn - that's wonderful to hear. Looking forward to finding out what the good news is. :)

What about wizards being the new vampires? Specifically child wizards fighting against the forces of evil with their pots?

Nah. Never happen.

p.s. Ha ha, I made a pun. I'm always so proud of myself when I make a pun. This was a good one. Please don't hate me because I'm punny.

Ha ha ha.; November 5, 2009 12:44 PM
Fresh Water Mermaids said...: hmmm, what do you suppose I will say?; November 5, 2009 12:44 PM
in the deep end of the pool said...: this thread was hilarious, and i'm proud to say that my vampyres don't sparkle, invite teenage love or do that emo pout thing. they do, however, kill with speed and precision, exact revenge, participate in deviant sexual behaviors, and ruthlessly murder.

i think my next book with be about Liana's "ZOMBIE half-demon pirate fairy post-apocalyptic ninja drag queen" though.; November 5, 2009 12:50 PM
Gloria Oliver said...: Come on guys, let's try for originality! Let's do tough love motorcycle riding nuns! (If that's not good enough, let's do ninja motorcycle riding nuns! Woot!) :P; November 5, 2009 12:56 PM
Wanda B. Ontheshelves said...: Mammalian personifications of the war on global-warming - for adults, not children (hmm..."war on" - where did I get that phrase, hmm...too much politics...must stop following...); November 5, 2009 1:03 PM
TKA said...: All I have to say is, you people are SO FUNNY! Thanks for so many laughs in one short lunch hour.

I can't even think what may be the next vampire. I am too busy laughing.; November 5, 2009 1:04 PM
AstonWest said...: I'm pretty sure I said space pirates are the new vampires on a previous post, but it deserves repeating... :-P; November 5, 2009 1:13 PM
Catherine M. said...: I kinda like Ink's idea. Wallaby. Yeah, it rolls off the tongue. So how about a ninja wallaby, because it would probably be really good at kicks, high jumps and related sort of matrix-like moves. But not zombie wallabies, because that's just mean to do that to something so cute.

OR - vampires that actually ummm...drink human blood?? Straight from the source.; November 5, 2009 1:24 PM
Joe Cooper (fiction) said...: Vampires are the new vampires. Because, you see, we will never go away.; November 5, 2009 1:26 PM
K.A. Dawn said...: Well I know I'm probably the only one, but I'd like to see more Victorian/Edwardian influences in books, with gentleman and ladies.; November 5, 2009 1:27 PM
T. Anne said...: Dopplegangers from space. It's be a hit in YA and romance.; November 5, 2009 1:29 PM
Jarucia said...: I think Krod Mandoon was on to something when they introduced the swinging bi cyclops character(O Biclops, Where Art Thou).

We need more of those in all types of writing...non fiction referential pieces too!; November 5, 2009 1:31 PM
Colette said...: Okay, I'm going in an entirely different direction here. Insider traders are the new vampires. (Okay, maybe this isn't fiction.); November 5, 2009 1:34 PM
Sheppardde said...: I personally think it will be abandoned broomsticks, with or without an accompanying winged cat who's name will inevitably end with
-lem or some phonetically similar substitute.; November 5, 2009 1:38 PM
Chuck H. said...: @Gloria Oliver

As a lapsed Catholic, former seminarian, motorcycle ridin', martial arts lovin' idiot, I should have thought of Motocycle ridin' Ninja Nuns.

Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Maxima Culpa.; November 5, 2009 1:40 PM
Linda Godfrey said...: Metrosexual pig men. Once you get past the snout and tail, they're suave, urbane, and a little dangerous with those pointy hooves. And they NEVER sparkle.; November 5, 2009 1:43 PM
Dan Holloway said...: Bankers and Borgias, Nathan.

When people finally realise steampunk's run out of steam, there are two topics that'll be hot on the mainstream and indie presses.

In the former camp it will be, alas, the turn of the banker - heaven help us it will be the banker who finds his soul after losing his job,and we'll have to sit through another year of middle-class hippy conscience-cleansing nonsense.

Fortunately the indies will have a much more fruitful and interesting look past post-recession to post-eco; we will see the emergence of the generation that takes on the issue of climate change and says hang on, when does the austerity end? Where's the logic to acting for the future's sake? where are we in this? So I predict a rise in books on hedonism and lviing in the moment - hell, if there isn't yet another glossy reprint of Epicurus (have publishers FORGOTTEN how huge he was during the ozone layer scare? Of course they have) I'll eat my beard. And that means one thing - books about hedonistic, individual times and ideals. it means LaVeyan stanism will snag some interest as a backdrop of choice, as will that old chestnut the last days of Rome, but trendwise I see the ardour for all things historical morph steampunk into Renaissance-lit - and to give the individualism and hedonism of the time a little uptodating, almost certainly there will be a techno edge - expect Borgiabot and references to Galileo & Copernicus to cock a snoop at their scientifc legacy as well as historical context.; November 5, 2009 1:48 PM
Bane of Anubis said...: Deadbeat children; November 5, 2009 1:51 PM
danielle said...: Victorian cyborgs are the new vampires. Surely.; November 5, 2009 2:02 PM
Steve Axelrod said...: Gay teen zombie dragons; November 5, 2009 2:05 PM
wendy said...: Winter Roses - socially relevant and spiritually radical - is the new (aged) vampire. *whistles*

Plus what Mira said - 8.53am.

Or maybe 'Pyroya' is the new vampire. (word verification) Post on Nathan's blog and get inspiration.; November 5, 2009 2:11 PM
Christina said...: I'd have to go with undercover ballerina detectives.
:); November 5, 2009 2:19 PM
Cheree said...: I've seen a lot of angel books out there, as well as zombies... so what about angel zombies.; November 5, 2009 2:20 PM
Anita Saxena said...: Either Nephilim or Zombies; November 5, 2009 2:32 PM
Courbet said...: Gotta say that I have a real weakness for any Vampire story. The new movies and books just show that each new generation loves 'em and wants more.

Now there's a new twist, the Psychic Vampire, less bloody and more complex. A good example of this is Annie's Gift. This is the type of monster new vampire readers are drawn to. Scary? Yes, but not the type of vampire that sleeps in a coffin, More psychological; November 5, 2009 2:35 PM
lora96 said...: Centaurs.

Cheese.

Pirates.

Ooohh a star-crossed romance between a telepathic pirate and a member of the ancient family of mountain-dwelling centaurs famed for their artisanl cheeses whom she robs!

C'mon it screams film potential! I see it now---Benicio del Toro as a brooding centaur cheesemaker and feisty but angelic Emmy Rossum as the swashbuckling telepath. :P; November 5, 2009 2:35 PM
Jane Opal said...: Hello? Has NO ONE thought to mention Doctors...? Or, uh....Time Lords? =]; November 5, 2009 2:36 PM
christina said...: Oh! How about ferrets! Or, angels- that don't sparkle!
:); November 5, 2009 2:40 PM
Jil said...: I vote for escapees from computer games to be the next Vampires.; November 5, 2009 2:40 PM
Aspiring Nurse and Writer said...: This post has been removed by the author.; November 5, 2009 2:53 PM
Jill said...: witches!; November 5, 2009 2:55 PM
Aspiring Nurse and Writer said...: Pole-dancing werepeacocks with a limp and repeated fungal infections, that sing show tunes, replay scenes from Flashdance and find love against all odds........; November 5, 2009 2:58 PM
Joann said...: The new vampire is a double-barreled-shotgun-wielding beet farmer who produces very thirsty babies and demands you replace his gramama's best crown.

Or I may have just finished watching The Wire on DVD, miss Omar, and can't wait for The Office tonight.; November 5, 2009 3:00 PM
Sarah Scotti-Einstein said...: *I* am the new vampire! (...said the memoirist, who then slunk off in a huff when no one agreed with her.); November 5, 2009 3:03 PM
Dawn Hullender said...: I'm going to go with post apocalyptic zombie vegetarian shapeshifters with high IQ's and a sense of right and wrong.

They won't eat meat, but they will clean out your vegetable garden.; November 5, 2009 3:14 PM
Jenny said...: IRS agents; November 5, 2009 3:15 PM
Karl Dickens said...: Glen Beck with Frickin Laser Beams Attached His Head are the New Vampires.; November 5, 2009 3:18 PM
Kate said...: Westerns. Well, "neo"- westerns. I think that's a word. Ish.

I feel a revival coming on.; November 5, 2009 3:21 PM
Vegas Linda Lou said...: Bowlers.

Especially African-American bowlers.; November 5, 2009 3:23 PM
Lea McKee said...: Fallen angels are the new vampires. I've read three books in the last week about fallen angels. A great YA one was HUSH, HUSH by Becca Fitzpatrick. :); November 5, 2009 3:24 PM
Matty B said...: Deep fried baby hand.; November 5, 2009 3:25 PM
Anonymous said...: first choice: hermaphrodites (big potential for angst there!)

second choice: surgeons

third choice: crane operators; November 5, 2009 3:25 PM
Ryan Thomas Riddle said...: The next big thing: fuzzy, wuzzy murderous psycho clowns.; November 5, 2009 3:30 PM
D. Michael Olive said...: Ass-kicking angels; November 5, 2009 3:31 PM
tricia said...: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to this week's Transylvanian Tag Team Wrestling. Aaaand, in the red corner are the New Vampires...; November 5, 2009 3:32 PM
Sandi Harris-Gompf said...: Dryads (tree monsters) are the new vampire.; November 5, 2009 3:37 PM
Scott said...: After some thought, I'd like to change my answer to hermaphroditic werewizards. Duh.; November 5, 2009 3:39 PM
marye.ulrich said...: werewolves and/or angels; November 5, 2009 3:44 PM
Tricia said...: Bruce Campbell

Jack in the Box

Winnie the Pooh

The Michelan Tire Baby; November 5, 2009 3:46 PM
A said...: To the fellow who suggested Swamp Monsters, please read Jim Shepard's amazing short story "The Creature from the Black Lagoon" from his Love & Hydrogen collection.

I agree with everyone who said: fairies, angels, pirates, unicorns, neanderthals, gargoyles, mummies, old vampires, cyborgs, witches, demons, gnomes, trolls, were-teens of any variety, and the reincarnated -- provided that none of the above actually gets to have sex between the pages.

The sexually frustrated are the new vampires!; November 5, 2009 3:48 PM
annerallen said...: My favorite suggestion so far: that time-traveling hot Amish quilter.

This has got to be one of Nathan's silliest threads. I love it. Maybe Silly is the new Vampire?; November 5, 2009 3:51 PM
Anonymous said...: Cereal skillets.; November 5, 2009 4:11 PM
Dawn Simon said...: Monkeys; November 5, 2009 4:13 PM
Jamie said...: What will be the new vampire?

Blonde zombies with an insatiable lust for brrraaaaaands. The devil may wear Prada but the zombie apocalypse will cut you if you are not fierce on the runway, bitch.

*ahem*

Or maybe sea turtles.; November 5, 2009 4:16 PM
Thomas Bradley Jr. said...: The Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man...; November 5, 2009 4:21 PM
Laura Martone said...: Uh, travel writers?

Yep, that's it. Travel writers are the new vampires... which would be a good thing for me. *wink*; November 5, 2009 4:22 PM
Laura Martone said...: I'm with Dawn, though. Monkeys could in fact be the new vampires. And what about vampire monkeys? I'd be first in line for that book.; November 5, 2009 4:23 PM
Disgruntled Bear said...: AM is right; it's humans with paranormal abilities like telepathy. I'm at a writer's conference now, and they're here.; November 5, 2009 4:24 PM
Andrea Cremer said...: demonic kittens are the new vampires. Cute and deadly? Nothing can defeat demonic kittens.; November 5, 2009 4:27 PM
kalincasey said...: I feel like werewolves always get a bump-up with vampires, and zombies have been in for a while, too.

I'm rooting for the wallabys, but I'm going with gods, Greek or otherwise.

Ooh! Good vampire-related word ver: dedboxi; November 5, 2009 4:33 PM
Ted2112 said...: Disgruntled kids who wear lots of black clothes that they bought at the Mall with their parents credit cards and are really board; November 5, 2009 4:42 PM
Linda said...: Young males wallowing in ennui but wearing strands of garlic and wielding wooden stakes...; November 5, 2009 4:44 PM
Jana said...: I think alcoholic newfie zombies from Mars are the new vampires. At least here in Canada...; November 5, 2009 4:44 PM
ryan field said...: There's Zombie material out there right now and it seems to be gaining a following.; November 5, 2009 4:45 PM
brian_ohio said...: The Headless; November 5, 2009 4:58 PM
Lisa Dez said...: AndreaCremer--

I'm betting your NIGHTSHADE werewolves would snap those demonic kittens in half like a Milkbone. ;); November 5, 2009 5:10 PM
Anonymous said...: I am the new vampire.; November 5, 2009 5:16 PM
betsy said...: Go angels go! Fallen angels who keep talking cats and solve mysteries. Yeah... a sort of angels policing demons detective department. Only it'll be a cozy mystery with some old lady as the murderer. Cuz yanno we all want her to be the murderer.; November 5, 2009 5:25 PM
educlaytion said...: Fame-seeking parents. Either that or health care reformers of all ilks.; November 5, 2009 5:53 PM