All the news that’s fit to print. In a blog.
Karl Rove has stepped down from his position within the White House and like 299,999,999 other Americans (wait, how many people are there in this country again? Basically that number minus one), he is interested in writing a book. So how much would editors pay for Turdblossom’s memoir? I’m glad you asked, because blog favorite AP reporter Hillel Italie is on it. Steve Ross, newly of Collins, Jon Karp of 12 and Ash Green of Knopf expressed some degree of interest, but according to Italie, “Asked what kind of money Rove might receive, Karp and Green each said they doubted he would receive anything close to the multimillion dollar contracts of former Federal Reserve chair Alan Greenspan or of former President Clinton.” Let’s just say Mr. Rove may have helped elect a two-term president, but he is no Keith Richards.
Jonathan Lyons compiled some query stats for a day, and if you’re anything like me (and if you are, God help you), you will find them very interesting. In particular, 5 people sent queries with Spam blockers in effect, and 5 queries made no sense whatsoever. Wait. Shh. Did you hear that? That was the sound of MY HEAD EXPLODING. Sadly Jonathan did not compile statistics on queries that began with rhetorical questions, but I’d like to think he did that to spare my mental well-being.
Via Publishers Lunch, POD publisher AuthorHouse has teamed up with Borders UK to sell self-published works through five Borders stores. Authors will pay anywhere from £849 to £1999 for the Borders package, which, according to the current exchange rate, translates to about $237,000 USD. (Ah, financial humor. Have you heard the one about the Fed overnight loan rate? No? It’s not very funny either.)
And finally, are you a Borders employee? If so, you now have a one in 30,000 chance of being published (…so you’re telling me there’s a chance…). Yes, as reported by our good friends at GalleyCat, Borders announced a plan to solicit manuscripts from its employees. The winner(s) will then be published by Borders and mark sold in Borders stores by the 29,999 other employees who were not deemed worthy of publication. Ha! That’s going to be rough.
Have a great weekend!
wolf says
Turd Blossom’s book? Wouldn’t touch it, but I know bunches of other people will. He’ll make his millions, all right.
And if I were a Borders employee, I think I would submit my book through ‘normal’ channels before I took advantage of their competition. Not only will it have to be sold by your competition (“No, ma’am, I wouldn’t buy this piece of drivel if I were you”) but even if it’s a good book it’ll suffer from the stigma of being part of a marketing ploy, methinks.
Anonymous says
I think I’d actually rather read OJ’s book….
A Paperback Writer says
Nathan, isn’t the term “financial humor” an oxymoron?
Anonymous says
Good nickname, but I’d leave off the “blossom” part.
Marti says
I equate a book by Karl Rove in the same category as OJ, too. Disgusting, but it’s a free market and I’m sure there would be lots of buyers.
Best wishes to you for a fabulous weekend! Thanks for all you do!
Kim Stagliano says
If they print it on two ply I’ll use it…… Would anyone care to join me for extra spicy chili that night?
Anonymous says
Not so many comments today…I think your readers are out applying for jobs at Borders. Heehee.
Heidi the Hick says
TURD BLOSSOM!!!!!
Oh my gosh, I have got to use that.
Anonymous says
People, Nathan didn’t create the nickname “Turd Blossom.” GWB did. Apparently, he has a nickname for everybody. Hmm, I wonder what mine is?
Dave says
For those of you who never been on a farm, horse manure and cow manure or as they are sometimes called – FLOPS – lie untouched on the ground. Unless the farmer picks it up and distributes it on his field as fertilizer. Or his kids have cow flop throwing contests. It’s not evil sh#t, it’s good sh#t.
When a flower grows out of a cow flop, it’s called a TurdBlossom.
GWB gave Rove the nickname years ago.
Sweet, isn’t it. kinda brings a tear to your eye.
And if no one else does, Regnery Publishing will pick up his book.
Anonymous says
Are you kidding? Rove could write a terrific book. Power behind the throne, inner workings of the White House . . . he could write a book we’d all need to read.
The trouble is, he won’t write that book. He’ll write spin and fluff that won’t be worth publishing or reading.
Writers are taught to be vulnerable and honest, to express rather than impress. Political figures are taught to be the opposite way, which is why almost none of them will write books worth reading.
Anonymous says
Paul O’Neil’s book was worth reading.
Anonymous says
Although I forgot to mention that Ron Suskind actually wrote it…
Bernita says
Dave, where I come from they were called cow FLAPS.
Zen of Writing says
I heard Borders has 60,000 employees now, some willing to work for nothing.
Alonna says
Hey Nathan,
I sent my query to an agent, stating Word Count ‘A’, and then a week later, I cut a lengthy yet unnecessary part from my manuscript. I’m now at Word Count ‘B’. Should I let the agent know this if he requests a partial, or is that even going to matter?
Nathan Bransford says
Alonna-
I wouldn’t say anything.
Anonymous says
If somebody were to submit a query letter with no bio, woud you throw the query out, or read the sample material before making a decision?
Nathan Bransford says
Anon-
I would just read the material.